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It is not news that we are a society in the throes of coming to terms with its own imperfection. We are fast approaching 20 years of discovery and exploration of our 'dark side', slowly pulling back the heavy, dusty drapes that we've used to cover up and hide our dirty little secrets. Finally, we are becoming able and willing to allow the light of our courage to shine on what has been left to fester for far too long.

The pain of the act itself is bad enough; but it is our commitment to keeping it hidden that has allowed and continues to allow these acts to go on and on and on… claiming new victims by the 100's in the time it takes for us to take a single breath.

What will it take for us to make a difference? How will we find a way through the density and intensity of the consequences of domestic violence and the abuse of our children? It has become evident that we are a people who cannibalize our children. We chew up their innocence and spit out their souls, leaving empty shells that rely on old habits and repetition to help them make their way through the day as productive human beings. And worse, some of these have themselves become the shadows in the night that strike terror into the heart of those defenseless in their presence.

We have silenced ourselves to protect ourselves. We have silenced ourselves to protect our parents, our teachers, our coaches, our religious leaders, our doctors, our counselors, our police officers, our social workers, and on and on and on… We have silenced ourselves to protect those who are deemed to command respect and demand compliance. And we have silenced ourselves for all the right reasons and all the wrong results.

We have been silent far too long. We have choked back the screams and stuffed down the rage and the terror and the fear for far too long. We have allowed the truth of our own experience to lay dormant, in the recesses of our own awareness, for what seems like eons - only to discover that the truth inside us will not be silenced. Try as we might, it presses insistently against the very cells of our being, its jagged edge causing our bodies to breakdown and manifest the secrets we carry. Disease – in all its manifestation – will not let us rest easy in our lies.

We get sick. In body, mind and spirit, we become ill and unable to function. We succumb easily to stress. Sometimes our secrets become evident in the breakdown of the body (like organ and skin disorders) or in the breakdown of the mind (behavioural and social disorders). Either way, our bodies become the road maps back to the treasure trove of information and insights that await our attention.

But wait! Treasure trove, you say? Not so! More like a cesspool… or pile of garbage… or, at best, unwanted baggage! And yet, consider for a moment : how will we ever become more than those experiences if we cannot learn from them and change who we might become?

Imbedded in every memory is an undeniable truth: the truth of our own experience. No one can take issue with the truth of our own experience. Not our truth about someone or something else – but our truth about us! About our terror, our pain, our shame. About our powerlessness and vulnerability. About our innocence lost. No one can take away from us the truth of our rage! Of our sometimes screaming desire for vengeance! Of our murderous intent to get even!

No one can silence the truth of our experience – the one that lives inside us and is relentless in its determination to call us to it – except us. No one can force us to continue to carry a shame that is not ours – except us. And no one – NO ONE! – can continue to silence the voice inside us – except us.

In a world profoundly shaped by the magic of quantum science, we now know that this same science shapes us – shapes who we are as human beings and shapes our potential. This science now tells us that we are not what we have been taught to believe – we are so very much more! And this science tells us : that which moves inside is intelligent, and carries in its flow the very information that we need to be able to get our lives back. All we need to do is listen.

Our voices are intended to be strong and full and rich. The truth of our experience is intended to be a pathway – a guide – to allow us to reach our own potential. Our histories, and all that they contain, are intended to be a gateway to the future, not a prison cell to hold us trapped in the limitations of those who once were able to shape our lives. That we were required to surrender our past – high jacked by our circumstances and the co-creators of our lives - does not mean that we are destined to surrender our future.

Breathe… follow the impulse…and let yourself know the truth of your own experience. Not your truth about someone else, but your truth about you.

Trust your body – it is not the enemy! Your body is designed to 'process' or 'metabolize' all the information that it carries. Your body is the instrument that created the internal cues and it is the only one that knows what to do with them and how to do it.

Allow… your body to process the full measure of your truth; your awareness to claim it; and your voice to ensure that it is never forgotten, or repeated.

When we silence the body, we become sick. When we silence the mind, we become slow and dull. But when we silence the voice, we become destined to live lives of quiet desperation embedded in the repetition of the past. In all that I know, and in all that I have become, the one true sound that I can rely on has been my own voice, resonating – moment to moment – with the truth of my own experience. Not always polite; not always politically correct; and not always socially acceptable, the sound of my voice reveals to me – in its timbre and tone – whether or not I'm lying to myself. And that is the first step down a slippery slope.

Claim what moves inside you. And remember one final thought: never allow anyone or anything to get between you and the truth of your own experience. It is our birthright and our pathway home to who we know we were destined to become.


Louise LeBrun has been changing lives - including her own! - for more than 25 years. In times of uncertainty, agitation and fear, she believes that what is inside us will shape what unfolds outside of us, as evidenced by the choices we make. Her original and extensive collection of books, CD’s and guided experiences have been helping women to trust the truth of their own experience, redefining and reclaiming leadership for a new world.

This article was originally published in Body Mind Spirit Magazine   Edition 21 - June/July 2005.

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Creative Commons License From Victim to Victorious Voice by Louise LeBrun is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 2.5 Canada License.
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